I got 99 problems and men are half on them.

I'm not even sure how to start this entry. I don't normally spill out my feelings about intimacy for the world to see. But I guess the best way to do it is with word vomit. I used to think that I had a hard time with guys when I was back in America. You know with being with shitty guys and then being single for almost 7 years. I just never felt that I had much luck with them. So like any sane woman would do, I thought about becoming a lesbian. figure it was the best option I had. So I weighed the pros and cons of it, and while I highly respect and love lesbians, I am not cut out for it. So I had to learn to deal with men. But the older I get, the more confused I get about them.

Fast forward to now......... I feel even more confused about the opposite sex more than ever. I don't know if it's because I am becoming more of a woman who understands her needs and what she wants. Or because..... Shit I can't even finish that statement. That's how confused I am. Now I just started to get the hang of dealing with American men. Then I had to go fuck up some shit and move to Australia. So now I have to deal with Australian men. Which is a whole different story. I mean it is literally like dealing with another species. My poor brain can't deal with it. And my heart has no say because that bitch is locked up in a cage somewhere. And she not getting out for a while.

Now I am not just talking about some guy that I am talking to. Well trying to talk to. The situation is an unnecessary complicated. But I am also talking about men that I deal with on a daily basis. Rather they are my coworkers with too big of a fucking male egos for their own good or my landlord. Hell, even some of my male friends I am so confused about. I feel like I am having issues with all of the men in my life right now. I mean, does anyone else have this issue? Where it seems like they are all fucked up at the same time? Is this some kind of cruel horrible storm before the sunny day? Or is it just what happens when you turn 25?  Maybe it's a cultural thing. That's a thing though. Right? 

I wish there was an instruction manual on how to deal. Cause on a scale from 0 to even, A bitch straight can't. And I think it would be better for me not to stab one of them. Especially when I have to work with them and they all have their stupid penis club. Also, because I am not trying to be the one lady with 37 cats. Granted, I could name all of them IF I needed too. I think I just need my Vanilla Latte here with me. I know this is a confusing blog entry, but the next entry will help sum up some questions you may have. In the mean time, look at some photos.

My expression on trying to figure men out. Clueless.

Me trying to find love in hopeless places.

Some random Asian ladies wanted to get our pictures. LOL.